Who were the most dissolute Polish kings and princes?

 They fought with rivals, conquered lands, and ruled wisely or not so wisely. Polish rulers are not only dignified figures from old paintings. The highest position in the state allowed them to treat some moral commands and prohibitions more loosely. Sometimes to the scandal of the closest environment, sometimes with their consent. Who were the most dissolute rulers of Poland?

The perception of the ruler largely depended on how his contemporaries perceived him. If he was liked, they looked over his fingers at his antics. The king was treated as a representative of his realm. For medieval authors, the king's sinfulness drew God's wrath on the whole nation. Therefore, sometimes failures and defeats of the country were associated with the bad behavior of the ruler.

On the other hand, the archetype of the ruler-father of the nation was even older. His sexual potency meant fertility and prosperity, and the ability to father a large number of descendants allowed him to form alliances with other countries and ensured the continuity of the dynasty. The rulers of the Slavs before Christianization practiced polygamy, just like many ancient rulers of the great civilizations of the Middle East. For the Christian chroniclers, however, this was a practice of "savage" pagans that had to be eradicated. That changed in the Renaissance. In the Renaissance, having mistresses was not as strongly condemned as in the previous era. Nobles, kings and clergy had illegitimate children. They often gained a high position in the state or local politics of a self-governing city. This model was common primarily in the Apennine Peninsula. Many popes made no secret of their affairs and openly promoted their illegitimate children. It was not uncommon for mothers themselves to push the heirs to the throne into the arms of an experienced mistress who was also a spy for the queen-mother. The model reached Poland together with the Italian teachers of the royal children, and above all with the court of Bona Sforza.

Turning a blind eye to the mistresses of kings was even more common in the times of noble democracy. Given the possibility of choosing a ruler from among the nobility, offspring was not his first concern. It is important that he is fit for the tasks that the country is facing at the moment. In the eighteenth century, promiscuity at royal courts – this time mainly on the example of Versailles – was simply in vogue, and royal favorites had a huge impact on the policy and personnel decisions of the ruler.

The medieval rulers of Poland were known for their violent character, which was generally considered a good quality. Chroniclers treated their sexual excesses in various ways.

1. Bolesław the Brave - certainly committed at least one particularly heinous rape of a Kievan princess when he captured that city. But it was more of a political act. We know that Brave was a ruthless man, rather cruel than dissolute. Przecława, whom he raped and abducted as a concubine from Kiev, played an important political role in the conflict with Jarosław Mądry. In doing so, he not only won the woman he desired, but humiliated his adversary and his ally. As a sign of political ruthlessness, this act was praised by the chronicler. (cf. Zientara B., PKiKP, 1991: 26)
2. Władysław Spindleshanks - not only was he famous for his debauchery, but he died at the hands of a girl whom he probably wanted to rape. The duke's killer was German, and their meeting was definitely not a romantic tryst. In a later chronicle, Jan Długosz, based on unknown sources, directly stated that Spindleshanks was disliked because of "debauchery and fornication". (Zientara B., PKiKP: 154)
3. Casimir the Great – is probably the most famous lecher among the Piasts. We certainly know that he had a weakness for many women, Jan Długosz (although it is not known on what basis) even ascribes to him the creation of an extensive harem (cf. Teler M., 2008: 39). The fact is that if a lady appealed to his senses, it didn't matter whether she was peasant, townswoman or noblewoman, Christian or Jewish. One of his most famous mistresses is, after all, the semi-legendary Esterka. It was because of her that Kazimierz was to extend the rights of Jews in Poland. Previously, the mistress, and then the king's wife, was a Czech townswoman - Krystyna Rokiczana. The chroniclers also mention the daughter of the castellan of Siechów, Cudka. One of the greatest jokes in history was that Kazimierz, having many illegitimate children (including healthy sons), did not live to see a legitimate offspring.

We know that Mieszko II, Bolesław the Bold and Casimir the Just, Duke of Sandomierz, also had mistresses. However, it was not debauchery that was not the main vice of the representatives of this dynasty.

The Jagiellons, compared to other European Renaissance families, look rather pale (or if you prefer - virtuous). This image in the eyes of Poles was preserved above all by Kazimierz Jagiellończyk. The king was certainly not an angel, but he avoided alcohol, took care of hygiene and physical fitness, and fathered more children with his not very pretty, but legitimate wife, Elżbieta Rakuszanka. Maciej of Miechów claims, however, that the king enjoyed the pleasures of bed and table, he also had mistresses. However, he cared about the image and did not lose himself in debauchery. He was above all a ruler and a responsible politician. Who in this dynasty deserves to be called a truly licentious ruler? First of all, two kings:

1. Jan Olbracht – never married, but he did not shun carnal love. He also liked to eat well and, above all, to drink copiously. Chroniclers record that he got into a drunken fight at least once. The cause of the childless death of the Polish king was probably syphilis, which is the best testimony to the "interesting" life he led. However, it is possible that, like his father and brothers, he was prone to stroke and cardiovascular disease. Besides, he was a Renaissance man - fond of science, art, but also having fun. Debauchery was certainly not his dominant trait.
2. Sigismund II Augustus - perhaps the figure of this king was romanticized, but the term "amorous" is more suitable for him than "dissolute". It is even said that in the arms of women he sought escape from his depression, a cold relationship with his mother, and later a cure for numerous ailments. Although he did not avoid mistresses, the true love of his life was Barbara Radziwiłłówna (supposedly equally promiscuous). This king is perhaps more known as the patron of the occult than the lecher. Which makes him an equally interesting character, but for completely different reasons. He willingly collaborated with the then mages, alchemists and astrologers. One of his goals was to summon the spirit of his beloved Barbara.

Times, customs and criteria for choosing a ruler have changed. Only the Vasas hoped to be rooted on the Polish throne. Which, of course, didn't stop them from having affairs. Of this dynasty, the most dissolute was John Casimir - the younger son of Sigismund III Vasa. His romances were more like those of the French kings of his time, with whose court he was culturally connected. He wasn't handsome, but he had a hot temper. According to Herman Lindquist in his biography of the House of Vasa, "he molested all the women in his path, from servants to princesses."

Of the elective kings, many may be counted among the debauches:

1. Henry of Valois - although he reigned in Poland for only a few months, he is in many respects one of the most interesting elective kings. Firstly, it was his reign that started the period of elective monarchy in Poland. The key document was the so-called Henryków articles. Secondly, he was the only king who not only didn't really fight for power in our country, but secretly escaped at the first opportunity. As for his erotic life, he had many official mistresses, and he did not avoid prostitutes. Plus, he was bisexual. He liked to dress himself and his "bodyguards" in women's clothes, curled his hair and wore earrings in his ears. This "effeminacy", cross-dressing and the company of "beautiful men" (French mignones) were not welcome in Poland, but they were also not respected in France, torn by religious wars. He was certainly debauched, but he also had something of a metrosexual rock star.
2. August II the Strong - legend has it that he had over 300 children. He certainly had many mistresses. One of the most famous mistresses of the king in Poland is Countess Cosel, who spent 50 years in prison. She gained fame above all from Kraszewski's novel and the film based on it. Other royal mistresses include Maria Aurora von Königsmarck, a Swedish aristocrat (the couple's great-great-granddaughter was the French writer and, among others, friend and lover of Fryderyk Chopin - George Sand), Henrietta Rénard, a townswoman with whom he had a daughter, Anna Orzelska - one of the most beautiful women of that era and also a good scandalist. The most tragic mistress of the king, next to Countess Cosel, was Henrietta von Ostenhausen, later Stanisławska. Finding no happiness in marriage, she wanted to return to the favors of her royal lover, but was poisoned at the court in Dresden.
3. Stanisław August Poniatowski – he may not have been one of the most dissolute Polish rulers, but (in-)fame brought him an affair with the empress-harlot Catherine the Great. The romances of the kings were rarely politically neutral, but this arrangement was extremely unfavorable. The rulers of the weakening Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth and the expanding Russian Empire did not start from equal positions.

The promiscuity of kings, although sometimes treated as a manifestation of imperious strength and fertility, often did not turn out to be good for them. An amorous or lustful ruler was easy to manipulate by the circles sending him mistresses. If the court beauties were not enough for him, he had a chance to catch a venereal disease from a prostitute, which put the future of himself and his dynasty in doubt.

Polish rulers were by no means champions in these competitions. Nevertheless, they did not shun the pleasures of bed. What scandalized contemporary chroniclers and their surroundings, later pleased historians and genealogists. What missing descendants of the Piasts, Jagiellons or elective kings do we not know about? After all, in each and every one of us, theoretically, a little bit of royal blood can flow.

Bibliography:

• A Group of Polish Kings and Princes, edited by Andrzej Garlicki, Warsaw 1991 (Benedykt Zientara, Bolesław I Chrobry, pp. 26-34; Władysław Spindleshanks, pp. 147-154; Rafał Karpiński, Jan I Olbracht, pp. 304-315 )
• Herman Lindquist, The Vasas. Turbulent and Brutal History, Warsaw 2018
• Marek Teler, Women of King Casimir III the Great, Warsaw 2018